Gosh. This is a find which really does feel as if it’s from another era. I wrote at great length, rather gleefully, about the Germans’ one-sided love affair with all things British. I even went as far as suggesting 6 facets (archetypes? tropes?) of Britishness where Germans feel particularly comfortable, from Rosamunde Pilcher’s Cornwall to Gaslit London.
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As the leaves start turning here in Germany, you could be forgiven for thinking that Germany is turning into Britain if you were to stroll through a local shopping centre. At least two large department stores have a “British” theme for their fashion collections and advertising this Autumn.
First up is Karstadt, who announce that “Die Stadt wird very British” (“The City is turning British”). Clothes, perfumes, jewellery and other goods of British origin or style are being promoted by Karstadt with models in green wellies and Argyle pullovers. Even the prices are described as “very British” in the sense of being understated.
From the country-set vision of Karstadt, we move to Peek and Cloppenburg who have chosen “London Affairs” as the title of their Autumn fashion collection. The publicity material here is shot in the slightly bohemian world of Notting Hill art galleries.
Both of these retailers’ visions demonstrate the rather one-sided love-affair that the Germans have with Britain. While they can build better cars and certainly play better football (and, yes, the German women are World Champions without conceding a single goal), many Germans still hero-worship the British and all things British in a completely unconditional way. There are many people who still insist on speaking English to me even though my German is actually pretty good after 11 years here. It is considered completely normal to send pre-school children off to an “English for Kids (sic)” course. Almost every German you speak to will spin teary-eyed nostalgic yarns of their teenage school exchange trip, normally to some south coast seaside resort. And I remember clearly arriving at my first job here to find the young CEO of the advertising agency dressed up in Harris Tweed and corduroy, complete with 1930s Noel Coward accent. I assumed that this was some sort of elaborate joke at my expense, but it emerged that he always dressed like that (OK, he was a Freiherr and had an English grandmother, but still…)
British products and brands to be found in Germany tend to be those of the classic/luxury type. In the fashion world, brands like Burberry, Barbour and Clark’s are well-known. Most supermarkets will carry a few British brands. I spotted Twinings, Chivers, H.P Sauce, Duchy Originals and Walker’s shortbread our local REWE, as well as “Five Counties Cheddar” and “Lancashire with Cranberries” on the cheese counter. Interesting to note, there is no “bog standard” English cheese to be had. On the drinks side, whisky is increasingly popular and there are a number of specialist stores to be found, for real and online such as www.whiskymax.com . The upmarket “back to the good old days” retailer www.manufactum.de carries Colman’s mustard, Pear’s and Bronnley soaps.
British, English and Scottish shops, which pander to Britophile Germans as much as ex-pats, can be found in major cities and online. These include www.the-british-shop.de (upmarket look), www.british-shop.de (corner shop look) and www.british-shop-online.de (country diary look.)
As in all cases of unrequited love, the lover is absolutely blind to the faults of the beloved. Very little of the less desirable aspects of modern Britain is known about in Germany or is simply ignored as it does not fit into the perfect picture. Thus, any talk of Chavs, ASBOs and drunken teenage girls in town centres will simply bring blank looks, even if the terms are explained. It’s the same with celebrities. The only British celebrities that are known and popular here are those that fit in with some idealised picture of Britain. And Germany has enough of its own Big Brother and PopStar winners and losers without having to know about the antics of the British equivalents.
Although I talk about one idealised picture of Britain, in truth, there are many facets or archetypes that one can invoke here to position or promote a British brand. Here are six that the Germans feel particularly comfortable with:
Rosamunde Pilcher’s Cornwall
Bizarre as it may seem, the Germans have adopted the romantic novelist as their own and the German TV station ZDF has produced 70, yes, 70, of the lady’s stories for TV. The Cornish landscape and the rather kitschy romances have an appeal beyond just little old ladies and so many Germans have flocked to Pilcher country as a result that both ZDF and Ms Pilcher have awards from the British Tourist Board!
Braveheart
The swirl of the kilt, the bagpipes, brave Highlanders and whisky is another world that the Germans feel very happy in. This Celtic archetype is also extended to include the Irish. However, although Walker’s shortbread is a staple of British shops, I don’t believe that that other Scottish delicacy, the deep-fried Mars Bar has yet hit the German palate.
Swinging London
This archetype is probably the closest to the reality of modern Britain and thus the least comfortable. While a certain degree of eccentricity is expected from the Brits, there is reluctance to embrace anyone or anything that is too “out of control”. So the rather plasticky German supermodels Heidi Klum and Claudia Schiffer who are part of this “scene” through their partners are seen as better representatives of this world than real-life London girl Kate Moss.
The Royal Country Set
This is archetypal England at its best: see www.the-british-shop.de . The British royals are followed with great interest here and are often the subject of affectionate “comedy” sketches as well as documentaries. Having no official royalty of their own, the Germans are happy to “borrow” someone else’s. And while the royal families of Sweden, Denmark, Norway, Holland and Spain also hold interest, the strong blood bond with the Windsors seems to win out.
British Humour
Although British humour is usually cited by Germans as the quality that they admire in us the most, what we would call “real” British humour is rarely understood by Germans, relying as it does on word-play and a heavy dose of irony. The king of British humour in Germany is still Rowan Atkinson in his Mr Bean incarnation and I am sure it will come as no surprise that this show is watched and enjoyed by many people over the age of 6 in this country. Another little oddity that is often quoted by Germans as representing British humour is the comedy sketch “Dinner for One”. This sketch was produced in the 1960s by the German TV station NDR with an English cast (Freddie Frinton and May Warden) and now holds the record for the most-repeated TV program ever. Most Germans know the entire script off by heart so next time you hear Germans saying “same procedure as every year” or “cheerio, Miss Sophie!” you’ll know where it came from.
Gaslit London
The end 19thC/early 20thC London of swirling fogs, carriages and elegant detectives in evening dress is still a very popular image. Although Germany has never really picked up on modern British police or crime series, preferring the Swedish versions of Henning Mankell and his ilk, Edgar Wallace, Conan Doyle and Agatha Christie remain very popular.
There are other archetypes and worlds that represent Britain and the British for the Germans but you can be sure that these do not include benefit scroungers or hoodies. And of course, the benefit of this rather rose-tinted perception for us is that we Brits are automatically assumed to be aristocratic, noble and hilariously funny by the Germans unless we dramatically demonstrate otherwise.
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While the London Olympics, Downton Abbey, the Gin & Tonic revival, various cosy crime series, post-Hugh Grant rom-coms such as “The Holiday” with Cameron Diaz and those sanitised pop biogs kept Britannia’s flame going for a good few years, it’s down to a rather sad flicker now.
Brexit and RIP Queen Elizabeth II.
Older Germans still have fond memories and associations with Britain, and the stereotypes persist: cups of tea, fish & chips, politeness. But it’s all a little faded and dusty these days, like something hanging out too long in the sun at a seafront stall.
But I get the impression that many Germans, especially the young, regard Britain as expensive, hostile and troubled. And not particularly “cool”. I was shocked not long ago when a relative of my husband’s (a young man who’s mixed race) said he wasn’t keen on going to Britain as it’s “so racist.”
It’s a sad state of affairs, but I’m not without hope. The salvation of Britain may lie in the specific, the local, rather than the not-so-great whole. Whisky, for example, is undergoing a huge surge of interest here. While many of the little British grocery stores have closed down, whisky shops are thriving - even in the one-pig town where I used to live!
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