RETROWURST: Richtfest September 2007

 

Well, well, well.

By strange coincidence, on the eve of yet another long journey back to Brexit island, I see that 18 years ago, I was writing about jollier circumstances. Not selling up and moving out, but building and moving in.

Here’s the story of the Richtfest, some insight into Germans and DIY, and the state of the DIY retail brands back in September 2007.

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Last Friday, I attended another “first” for me here in Germany. After over 11 years in Germany, I had thought that I had exhausted my list of “first times” but it seems that there are ever-new obscure and fascinating traditions and opportunities for celebration here. The occasion on Friday was something called a Richtfest, which took place just over the road from our house. 

 

We live on an area of new housing in a small town east of Frankfurt. While some of the houses are finished, there are still a number of vacant lots available plus houses in various stages of completion. While much of the UK’s new housing is built by developers or the Barrett/Wimpey Homes of this world, it is still very common in Germany to search for your own plot of land and then commission an architect and building company to build to your own wishes.

 

The Richtfest is traditionally held when the main structure and roof beams are in place. A relation of the Christmas Tree, the Richtbaum – a pine, spruce or similar decorated with coloured ribbons, is fixed onto the gables and the craftsmen, workers, architect and building foreman are all invited along with the neighbours who have undoubtedly put up with all manner of dust, dirt, noise and huge machines in the last few months. To open the Richtfest, the carpenter, dressed in his traditional black corduroy outfit (which looks like a cross between a cowboy and someone from a 70s rock group) stands on the roof, a full Schnapps glass at the ready to give his carpenter’s speech or Zimmermannsspruch.The speech is a thank you to all concerned and asks for God to bestow His blessing on the house and all who live within. A little reminiscent of the launching of a ship, the Schnapps is then downed and the glass hurled from the roof. If it breaks, this is a good omen, but, should it stay intact, then all will not necessarily run smoothly for the new home-owners. This is, understandably, one of the most nerve-racking moments in a carpenter’s life – far more so that balancing 10m up on the roof wielding a heavy and dangerous saw!

 

Now, you may have heard that most Germans live in rented accommodation, mainly apartments and this is indeed true. Only 43% of Germans (45% former West Germany, 35% former DDR) own their homes, a level way below the European norm. The equivalent figure for GB is 69% and Southern Europe has even higher levels of home ownership, with Italy at 72% and Spain at 86%, for example. But the point is that, when Germans do decide to buy their home, the “gold standard” is literally to start from scratch with buying a plot, designing and building the house complete to one’s own specifications. Buying a house that someone else has built or had built is not seen as ideal as it is not likely to match your own personal needs and wishes. In addition, German houses tend to be pretty solid, so it is not usually a case of simply knocking down a few dividing walls.

 

Going back to all those rented flats: the vast majority of these are rented not only unfurnished but without what we would see as normal fixtures and fittings. The chances are that, if you move into a rented flat, the last occupants will have taken their kitchen and anything else built-in with them. And whether there are any light bulbs left will be the least of your worries: there will be no ceiling or wall lamps at all! And the tenants are responsible for the state of decoration of the property while living there and on moving out. This all leads me on to the main topic of this Extrawurst: DIY in Germany. As you can imagine, with all this building of homes from scratch, re-building someone else’s house to suit your personal needs and renovating your rented accommodation, DIY is big business in Germany!

 

Before I move on to look at some of the interesting players in the DIY market here, it’s worth looking at the psychology of DIY here, which I believe has a major influence on the market. Overall, the average German is probably more keen and more adept at DIY than his or her average British counterpart. From my work with IKEA, I have been in plenty of German homes and the occupants are always very keen to point out which tasks they completed with their own hands. I think it all stems from a pride in craftsmanship: craftsmen and skilled workers are very highly regarded in Germany. There is none of the “class divide” that still pervades the UK and a master carpenter will be regarded here as being on a professional level with, say, an accountant. Because no-one feels that “working with your hands” is “beneath them”, most Germans are quite keen to give it all a go themselves.

 

Another interesting point about the psychology is that Germans generally feel “safe” in an area where there are set rules and ways of doing things, that one can learn, rather than in the area of personal inspiration and creativity, where one can make a dreadful faux pas as there are no set rules. There is only one way to lay tiles, generally, but choosing the colour, pattern and matching it to the existing style is the area where Germans are more likely to flounder.

 

The market for DIY in Germany is huge and has a large number of players. Most of these are now large chain superstores rather than independent builders’ merchants, although these still exist, mainly for the professionals. Many of the large chains also have some presence in other European markets.

 

The number 1 in Germany is Obi www.obi.de with 334 stores in Germany alone and a major presence in Italy, Austria, Poland, Czech Republic and other European markets. Obi is one of the best-known brand names in Germany and the orange and black logo and “busy beaver” symbol are universally recognised. Obi started in 1970 and was one of the first to develop the USA DIY concept of “everything under one roof”. Obi is active in sports sponsorship and was one of the major sponsors for the World Cup 2007.

 

Bauhaus (www.bauhaus.info ) is probably the “gold standard” in Germany. The chain has 185 stores across Europe and positions itself on a “best choice, first class quality and excellent value for money” platform. Bauhaus’ advertising line “Wenn es gut sein muss” (“when it’s got to be good”) reflects this. The store experience in Bauhaus is probably the best in Germany, with excellent and well-qualified co-workers and a range of services from tool hire to video workshops on DIY topics.

 

The big personality among the German DIY chains is Hornbach (www.hornbach.de ). With their huge pink and orange monstrosities of stores and their unashamedly quirky advertising, you can’t really miss Hornbach. Although the roots of the store go back 130 years, Hornbach’s in-store experience is right up-to-date with demonstrations and seminars. The advertising campaign (“Es gibt immer was zu tun” “There’s always something to be done”) connects perfectly with the German Zeitgeist as far as DIY goes.

 

Finally, we come to Praktiker (www.praktiker.de ). Although a large chain with 245 outlets, Praktiker seem to have done everything wrong in the retail book and are suffering for it. From over-diversification (into travel and telecommunications), to an appalling in-store experience with non-existent service to a focus on price discounts that is ceasing to be credible, Praktiker seem to have messed-up.

 

Maybe the Schnapps glass didn’t break at their Richtfest.

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I don’t suppose there will be a Richtfest in Camberley when I move out, nor was there one when the houses were built in 1960. 

I wonder if there’s an alternative Richtfest for moving out - possibly celebrated by removing the house name sign - above?

RETROWURST: Edeka August 2007

 

The subject of this month’s Retrowurst is Edeka - the German Coop. Back in 2007, it was already over 100 years old and thriving. The supermarket had recently introduced a new corporate identity with “blackboard visuals” - focussing on the handmade/local element of their freshness and food strength.

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Whenever retail successes are discussed, in Germany as elsewhere, most of the talk centres on the discounters, such as Aldi or Kik, or on the new kids on the block (or stores in the mall, or sites on the Web.) But, just as the centenarian Marks & Spencer continues to be one of the UK’s retail success stories, Germany’s “old lady” of the grocery world, Edeka, has likewise enjoyed similar success here over the last few years.

 

Edeka’s story is an interesting exercise in making a very old concept relevant for today, not by throwing everything away and replacing with a hip new idea, but by looking at the original concept and seeing what, within this, is both relevant to today’s customers and offers a point of difference to the competition.

 

Edeka, which is either 100 or 109 years old this year, depending on how you look at it, is the German “Co-Op”. Edeka can trace its roots back to 1898 when Fritz Borrmann founded the “Einkaufsgenossenschaft der Kolonialwarenhändler in Halleschen Torberzirk zu Berlin”, of which “E.d.K” or Edeka” as you would speak it is the abbreviation. As an aside, I have noticed quite a few brand names in German are actually abbreviations of this type. As everyone knows, German is a language full of words that go on for sentences if not paragraphs, so it is useful to talk about a KiTa rather than a Kindertagesstätte (Kindergarten), about KiBa, which is a mixture of cherry (Kirsch) and banana juice, or to address someone as HaPe, who is normally saddled with the name Hans-Peter.

 

In 1907, Borrmann and his co-op partners formed the “Verband deutscher Kaufmännischer Genossenschaftler” or German Co-operative Society under the motto “Gemeinsam sind wir stark (Together we are strong).”

 

One hundred years later, Edeka is the number one grocery/food retailer in Germany, ahead of Aldi and Lidl. Edeka has a 26% share, ahead of next competitors Rewe at 18% and Aldi at 17%. There are over 10,000 stores in Germany and turnover is €37.2 bn. The growth and success of Edeka in recent years coincided with the appointment of Alfons Frenk as CEO of Edeka AG in 2003. Herr Frenk is an ambitious man with a tough background behind him. As one of six children growing up in a poor family in post-war Germany, Frenk knew shortages and hardship from an early age, resulting in an obsessive drive never to squander resources and to watch every pfennig. Herr Frenk is not content with Edeka’s number 1 position: he wants to reach a market share of 30% and to expand at a rate of opening 200 new Edeka stores per year. Part of his strategy is acquisition: Edeka has recently bought Spar and the discounter chain Netto.

 

While other retailers see diversification into non-food areas and expansion outside Germany as the way forward, Frenk’s strategy is exactly the opposite. Edeka has set its focus on fresh food and on Germany, withdrawing Edeka’s interests outside of the home market. This focus, combined with very keen attention to costs has meant an increase in profits of +60% since Frenk was appointed. Although it is tempting to make comparisons with a figure like Ingvar Kamprad, one must remember that Alfons Frenk is the head of a very different organisation to an IKEA or an Aldi. Edeka is a co-operative and its CEO does not have ultimate power.

 

Edeka has an extremely complicated organisational structure with regional co-operatives and societies. The store managers are mostly self-employed and the whole system has something rather mediaeval about it, akin to the feudal system with its regional barons. It was something of a revolution that Frenk managed to centralise Edeka’s computer system and his main challenge is to get the various factions working together to combine their strength and to improve overall efficiency.

 

Edeka’s heterogeneity is reflected in the different names it uses for its outlets, dependent on type, size and region. Under the “E” Edeka branding are “nah & gut”, “active markt”, “neukauf”, “center” and “C&C Großmarkt” (the Cash & Carry). In addition, a number of other retail chains such as Spar and Netto now belong to Edeka.

 

For the last two years, Edeka has been running an image campaign focusing on the main consumer benefit or point of difference for a heterogeneous, co-operative with local focus: “Freshness”, particularly in the areas of fruit, vegetables, meat and dairy produce. The staff and their specialist knowledge are key differentiating factors for Edeka and, although fresh food only represents 25% of the turnover, the margins are highest in this area. The tagline “Wir lieben Lebensmittel”, (“We love food groceries”) and the key visual of the blackboard stand for the specialist knowledge and passion of the staff and for the “handmade” and “local” feel that Edeka has:

 

 

 

 

But, while Edeka are single-minded in their brand communication, in retail one cannot ignore the competition. To compete with Aldi, Edeka have their own shop-in-shop “Gut und Günstig” where basic packaged groceries are offered at Aldi-like prices. The trick here, say Edeka, is to offer exactly the same deal where the public know the price to the nearest cent, such as milk, but to allow a few cents more on products that are not daily basics, such as mustard

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Edeka goes from strength to strength. In 2024, it was the 6th biggest supermarket in Europe, and turnover has more than doubled since the €37.2 bn quoted in the article to €75.3 bn.

The brand has a clever balance in its communication - advertising that gets noticed - sometimes cheeky, even provocative. A good example here is the brand throwing its political weight around in its anti-AfD advertising and action. I’m generally not a huge fan of brands and politics, but somehow Edeka gets away with it, in my view. 

Maybe that’s because of the solid consistency of the blackboard/Wir lieben Lebensmittel approach - definitely still going strong. And still looking fresh.

BREXILE: Passport Palaver

 

I’m doing it like this. 

Brexile-related activities only every other day, for the sake of my blood-pressure and family harmony.

This is one I’d been dreading, and was actually on the cards, Brexile or no Brexile. 

The joy of passport renewal. I kept putting it off because the fiasco of 10 years ago is still horribly fresh in my mind. In those days, you could get the whole process speeded up by taking everything to HM Passport Office in person (and paying a wad of cash for the pleasure).

I braced myself, with some professionally-taken biometric photos in tow that cost me a good few €s. And all was going smoothly until my expensive photos were rejected:

My pleas that it was cream or greyish and not Persil-white were to no avail. I was shooed off to the convenient photo booth where a combination of trying to take a picture without my glasses (which are for moderate-to-severe myopia, not for vanity), no makeup and unwashed hair resulted in a passport photo that looks like a corpse dredged up from the murkier parts of the Thames.

I’m not sure it’ll be any better this time. Renewals, from overseas too, are done online. And there’s no way of telling what you’ll need to answer or find or indeed pay in total without starting the thing onscreen.

It’s not a blinking exam, for goodness sake!

Now to my favourite topic: photos. Two options were presented: go to a proper photo shop or booth, and you’ll get a nice convenient code which will speed everything up.

Or mess around doing a selfie - and woe and betide you if you take this ill-advised option.

Unfortunately it has not occured to the UK passport office that professional photographers abroad e.g., in Germany, can do proper biometric photos but haven’t heard of this code system.

I struggled on.

Next issue - I owned up to having 2 passports (maybe unwise) and learned that I had to - in addition to the soon-to-expire British passport - send either my current German passport to the UK (no way!) or get a colour photocopy of all 34 pages. Including blank ones.

My colour copier has long since been deemed incompatible with my laptop. And the local copy shop closed down many moons ago. The local stationer's came to my rescue and gave me a discount - 60c instead of 80c per sheet. So much for sustainability, though – I could have sent photos or a scan but it seems that the UK passport office prefer to waste paper.

 

My day of fun was completed by a trip to the only remaining local post office, contending with roadworks, only one woman on duty, a queue of disgruntled people …  

Can’t wait to hear that it’s all been lost in transit.

Dixi-Klo: A brand in need is a brand indeed

 

I woke up in the night during the annual carnival carousing. On the way back from the comfort of our own bathroom I wondered why on earth I’d never blogged about what must be one of Germany’s absolute brand leaders.

It’s a brand whose name has become the generic here, like Tempo. I’m talking about the humble Dixi-Klo. From building sites to Fests of all kinds, here’s a brand that’s not going to save the world, but has certainly saved most of us from nasty spots of bother and embarassment.

The Dixi-Klo was invented, and given its name by a US soldier based in Germany, Fred Edwards. While on manoeuvres in 1973, he identified a gap in the market - presumably through bitter experience - as an alternative to the proverbial convenient grove of trees.

A German company founded Dixi’s main rival, TOI TOI ten years later. Toi Toi Toi  is best translated as “touch wood” - so a remarkably clever brand name all in all. The two businesses fused in 1997 and now give jobs (big and little) to over 4,000 people. TOI TOI & DIXI is said to be “the world’s largest portable restroom provider.”

On the company website, you can even find a Fan Shop, which sells everything from cool bags to drinking flasks to carnival outfits (could cause all sorts of kerfuffle for the inebriated and short-sighted as well as the wearer, I fear). And my favourite - an air freshener to hang in your car.

Who said Germans are short on humour?

I haven’t seen many case histories on TOI TOI & DIXI on LinkedIn, but both are brands that deserve a little more praise. 

The classic question on Meaningful Brands goes along the lines of “which brands would you miss if they were to disappear tomorrow?”

I rest my case. 

RETROWURST: Crisps & Snacks January 2007

This is a good one for January, where I’m sure I’m not the only one feeling a touch bloated and in need of some serious exercise in the fresh air. In the UK, I was addicted to crisps from an early age, and used to sneak off to spend my dinner money on crunchy snacks instead of Spam fritters. Probably healthier, actually.

One piece of evidence for my Teutonisation is that I really don’t eat so many crisps now. Certainly not the kgs mentioned in this Extrawurst from January 2007. In fact, I’m beginnng to develop a distaste for the nibbles/picky bits/grab bags/finger food/grazing business, although that could be because the words are so ghastly. 

Here’s the state of play in the world of crisps and snacks eighteen years ago ...

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Did you know that the Brits eat, on average, more than five times as many potato crisps per year as the Germans? The UK leads potato crisp consumption in Europe with an amazing 3 ½ kg per head per year, while Germans consume a mere 700g per head per year, one of the lowest consumption levels in Europe. In fact, only the Italians are less enthusiastic about crisps, with a consumption level of 600g per head per year.

 

Pondering on the reasons for the difference, I came up with the following factors. First of all, we should look at market development and history. Crisps have simply not been around for very long in Germany, relatively speaking. There is quite an interesting story behind their introduction to Germany which goes that a German show jumper, Irmgard von Opel, was on holiday in the U.S with her husband Heinrich and son Carlo when she discovered potato chips and decided that they would sell well in her home country. In 1962, the family set up the first production of Chio Chips, the brand name coming from the initials of the first names of the family. In 1968, another brand, Chipsfrisch, which would become the brand leader, was launched.

 

If one looks at the market for crisps here, it is relatively underdeveloped in terms of varieties, product forms, pack sizes and distribution outlets. Typically, crisps come in a large (175 g) pack size and the range of flavours is limited. The biggest seller is Ungarisch, which is a sort of Paprika flavour, followed by plain salted. Other flavours such as Pepperoni or Chinese are available, or even our beloved Salt & Vinegar, but these are reported to be successful only in cosmopolitan, city areas.

 

I have mentioned that distribution is more limited here in Germany. Crisps are not nearly as ubiquitous here as in the UK, where they can be found in school lunchboxes through to pubs. Neither of these places would harbour crisps in Germany, for reasons I’ll come on to! Instead, crisps are confined to the supermarket and perhaps the petrol station. Related to the ubiquity of crisps in terms of where you can buy them, habits are very different in terms of where and when you eat crisps. Crisps are really only eaten in the evening, in front of the TV. There is some use at parties but not to the extent seen at the UK and crisps tend to be consumed more in private at-home situations.

 

A lot of this has to do with a certain difference in food culture. In Germany, there is far less of the “snacks and nibbles” mentality than one gets in the UK. A party of any kind without proper food supplied by the host is frowned on and the idea of any kind of “nibbles” before a dinner party would be thought of as disrespectful to the food that is to come. One could say that there is a far less “playful” attitude to food, which is where crisps miss out. Although German food can tend toward the heavy and stodgy, there is an innate belief in proper, natural, unprocessed food. In this sense, although there is no Jamie Oliver watching over children’s lunchbox content, few German mothers would dream of putting anything other than a cheese or meat sandwich and fruit in their child’s lunch box. And anyway, the huge packets of crisps here simply aren’t designed for little hands.

 

But before you all start thinking that the weird Germans are totally missing out on the idea of something salty and crunchy to go with their Bier, we must remember the Salzstange or Brezel. Perhaps one of the reasons that crisps didn’t catch on was that their place was already occupied by pretzels. If a German bar offers any savoury snacks at all, it is likely that they will be little salty sticks. And pretzels often pop up at children’s parties and even in lunchboxes, albeit with some of the over-zealous Muttis scraping the salt off first. Pretzels are even thought to have medicinal properties, with a diet of Coca-Cola and Salzstangen considered a worthy alternative to Imodium to combat “the runs”.

 

In terms of the brand landscape for savoury snacks in total, the three main players are the leader, Intersnack, who own the Funny-Frisch (www.funny-frisch.de ) and Chio (www.chio.de ) brands, Lorenz Bahlsen Snack World (kings of pretzels and nuts) and Stöver who produce a lot of Own Label. Growth in the “stacked” crisp area is also building Pringles into a major brand. 

 

The only other product forms of real note in the market are Tortilla Chips and dips and Erdnuss Flips or peanut puffs. Minor products include onion rings, “Hula Hoops”, “Chiplets”, shaped savoury biscuits and ribbed crisps.

 

There is relatively little innovation in the market, but what innovation there is focuses on the lower fat/ natural area, for example, “Naturals” from Lorenz. But I think the door is wide open for more innovation in the gourmet area and the health/well-being area for adults and children. However, I think pickled onion flavour Monster Munch probably wouldn’t be a winner.

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Oddly, this is a situation that hasn’t changed hugely. There’s been an increase in snack and crisp consumption here, up to around 1.5 kg pro annum, although I couldn’t find any good, reliable recent figures. On the other hand, the Brits are munching more than ever before, at about 4.5 kg per munchy mouth - the results of which are all too apparent in any shopping centre.

Pringles and its imitators has become quite a staple here and there have been developments in Kettle Crisps and snacks made from chickpeas and other vegetables. A few weird new flavours have cropped up (Chilli Cheese Fries - the thought makes me quite queasy).

But it’s still big bags and, as far as I know, not much sneaking its way into the children’s lunchboxes. 

Condiments of the season

 

The clocks have gone back, the feather duvets retrieved from the cellar and the beergarden afternoons definitely a memory of sunnier days. At the weekend, I experienced a last stand in miniature from a Bavarian speciality that I associate firmly with the dog days of summer through to the autumn jollity of the Oktoberfest.

At a birthday party, we were served canapés of Weißwurst, Salzpretzel and a dollop of Süßsenf. Rather like this:

Weißwurst is a delicacy that doesn’t have the immediate appeal to Brits of a Bratwurst. I remember meeting a UK colleague in Munich at around 11am and his stomach definitely turned when I ordered this particular snack and started tucking in. The sausage itself is made from veal (I’m not over-keen to find out which particular bits), pork fat, parsley and spices. The discarded sausage skin does look particularly unappealing. Traditionally, these sausages were made in the morning and butchers and restaurants were keen to get rid of them by mid-day. Again, I’d rather not ask too many questions as to why.

They are, however, delicious and there’s a certain charm in the way they are served, floating around in a terrine-type bowl with lion’s head handles and maybe a Bavarian flag pattern:

 

Now, you may have noticed that mini-terrine of brown stuff to the right. Once again, I’ll refrain from saying what this resembles, but it is Süßsenf - sweet mustard. The mustard seeds are roasted and the mustard is sweetened with sugar, apple purée or honey. The first commercial producer was Develey, who are still going strong today. But the market leader is the one pictured above - Händlmaier. 

Karl and Johanna Händlmaier opened their first butcher’s shop in Regensburg in 1910, and Johanna created the Süße Hausmachersenf  in 1914, to go with the sausages they sold to eat on the premises.  Son Joseph and his wife Luise took over the butchers’ shops after the 2nd WW, and it is Luise who turned these into a thriving mustard and condiments business after her husband’s death in 1955. She’s the lady depicted on the label, of course.

The website is full of Weißwurst wisdom, including the etiquette for eating the sausages. In typical German fashion, it’s less about “how do you eat yours?” and more about orderly steps and correct procedures. 

Whichever way, it’s fun to be writing about sausages again on Extrawurst. It’s been a while!

  

RETROWURST: Baking November 2006

 

Advent is fast-approaching so it’s time to whisk yourself into the Home Bakery. 

I wonder if I’d have taken up baking if I hadn’t moved over here?

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If you were to wander around the shops in Germany at the moment, one thing that you wouldn’t fail to notice – apart from the explosion of Christmas decorations – is that the baking season is well and truly upon us. Every supermarket has displays of enticing baking ingredients and every Tchibo, Lidl or Aldi that does weekly products has a brochure with a picture of mother and cute daughter in red aprons, surrounded by an overwhelming collection of ingredients and gadgets from electrical cookie cutters to non-fat donut makers. This time of year, the just-before-advent season in middle to end-November is the absolute peak season for baking in Germany. It is expected that, by the first Sunday of Advent, that one should have baked enough Plätzchen – biscuits to you and me – to last you well until the New Year.

 

Although the pre-advent season is the peak of the baking-frenzy, Germany does have a strong culture of baking at most other times of year. Baking is one of those activities that combine a number of typically German values and obsessions. First and foremost, baking is an activity that has to do with family and togetherness: the idea of a gemütlich afternoon with advent candles, coffee and home-baked goodies in the close family circle is bound to get most Germans a little teary. Of course, most of the baking is done by women and this re-affirms many of the attitudes that the likes of Eva Hermann are trying to push back onto German women: that being a good Hausfrau should be the sole goal in life.

 

Another German value that baking reflects is that of tradition. Recipes are handed down through the generations and generations may come together to bake. The grandmother may be the expert on Stollen while the granddaughter may be a dab hand at the Zimtsternen. Most families will have very set traditions of where and when they enjoy their Adventskaffee. At other times of year, too, certain types of cakes and pastries come into their own:  Apfelkuchen and Pflaumenkuchen in the autumn, for example, or Berliner (doughnuts) at Carnival time.

 

Finally, baking gives wonderful expression to the German love of gadgets. It is quite amazing to see what even the average German household has in the way of baking gadgets. Several cake tins in different sizes, formats and materials are just the start of it. A waffle maker is standard, and cupboards and drawers will be full of everything from a plastic doily-like thing to make pretty icing sugar patterns with to a special “click shut and carry” plastic case for your Gugelhupf. German ingenuity really comes to the fore in the world of candied peel and chocolate hundred and thousands.

 

While baking seems to be something that has undergone a revival in the UK, in Germany, it never went away. There does not seem to be the cult of the celebrity chef here, although there are a couple of me-too German versions of Nigella or Jamie Oliver knocking around here, if that is not too unpalatable a thought. Perhaps this is because the real celebrities here are those millions of ordinary women who bake regularly for the Landfrauen stand at the town Fest, or the open day at the Kindergarten or simply for Sunday Kaffee und Kuchen, advent or not. Cakes and other baked goods are simply a part of life in Germany that “belongs to it” as they say here. At flea markets or craft fairs, the price to have a stand is usually a couple of Euros and a home-made cake. At every town or club celebration, there will be a cake stand. And any time that you invite someone around for coffee, no matter how informal the occasion, there will be at least some expectancy that you’ll have gone to a bit of trouble to bake something.

 

All this is not to say, however, that bought cakes have no place in Germany. Of course they do, but the homemade cakes are seen as the norm. In the supermarket, the range of pre-packed cakes is fairly narrow compared to the UK and is typified by the sort of cakes made by Bahlsen (www.bahlsen.de): relatively simple “slab” cakes. These are normally bought when you have a good excuse for not having baked yourself or for when people pop round spontaneously (not a very common occurrence in Germany, where everything is planned and double-planned). The cake is then produced with a rather apologetic face and comments will go along the lines of “well, of course these shop-bought cakes are adequate but it’s not nearly as good as your Aunt Waltraud’s.”

 

On the other hand, fresh “bought” cakes have a different status. Bäckereis and Konditoreis are sprinkled liberally all over Germany rather like flaked almonds or chopped pistachios. Cakes and Torten can be bought to be consumed on the premises or carefully packed for the Gemütlichkeit of one’s own home. The selection of cakes in these places tends to be extravagant to say the least but even here, there is often the feeling that, although the Torte may look like a work of art, Aunt Waltraud has probably still got the edge when it comes to the taste.

 

To get back to the business of home-baking, one brand really does rule the roost. While Maggi is the queen of the savoury kitchen in Germany, then Dr. Oetker is the king of baking. Dr. Oetker (www.droetker.de ) is an iconic, sprawling institution of a brand and seems to have dictated what goes on in German kitchens for over a hundred years. As well as providing all of the baking ingredients from baking powder to gelatine to flavourings to vanilla sugar – all carefully dosed-out and pre-portioned – Dr. Oetker also does a range of cake and pastry mixes and, importantly, for the role of the brand as bakery oracle, cookery and baking books. More than merely recipe books, these books have become indispensable classics in the “how to” art of baking. With increased mobility, these books can become a mother-substitute for young women wondering exactly how you do remove a sponge base from a 28cm Springform tin.

 

While Dr. Oetker is without doubt the leading player on the home baking stage, there is also a large cast of specialist supporting brands. When it comes to decorating your cake and specific ingredients, Schwartau (www.schwartau.de ), whose main strength as a brand is actually in fruit and jam, have everything you need from pre-zested lemon to poppy-seed filling. Toppits (www.toppits.de ) are specialists in baking paper products. And in the area of gadgetry, you cannot escape the presence of Fackelmann (www.fackelmann.de ) with their ingenious devices for the kitchen.

 

Finally, it is not all deep-rooted tradition in the world of home-baking, contrary to expectations. New trends and movements in other food and drink areas are seized upon enthusiastically in the baking world. In fact, Dr. Oetker publishes a book called Modetorten in which you’ll find – in addition to the expected Cappuccino and Latte in cake versions – cake recipes with Coca Cola and Fanta and even cakes in the shape of car tyres and snowboards.

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Of course, since 2006, Insta, Pinterest and TikTok have all become mini baking shows. Even I’ve joined in with my #sicklycakes 

Dr. Oetker’s Modetorten look as scrumptious and preposterous as ever online these days - anyone fancy an Aperol-Spritz Cake?

RETROWURST: Bionade October 2006

 

I wrote a piece about Bionade in October 2006, just as the soft drink brand with a difference seemed to demonstrate that “the only way is up.” Sales in 2004 had been 7 million bottles, in 2005 20 million and 2006 was looking to at least triple that.

Rather cheesily, I wrote that “this is the story of what happens if you follow your dreams, believe in your product and stay true to your roots.”

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Rather a lot of people in Germany are nursing hangovers at the moment, following the Oktoberfest and the celebrations in connection with the Tag der Deutschen Einheit on 3^rd October. And what better way to nurse a hangover could there be than with something healthy, refreshing and German? This is the success story of a new German brand – Bionade. 

 

Bionade is a non-alcoholic drinks brand that has taken Germany by storm in the last few years, interestingly, with very little traditional advertising investment. The story of Bionade is the story of what you can do if you follow your dream, believe in your product and stay true to your roots.

 

The Bionade story started twenty years ago, in the little 3,000 inhabitant town of Ostheim vor der Rhön, which is in the North-Eastern part of Bavaria: brewery country. In this area, there are, or were, numerous small, family-owned breweries. The Braumeister of one such brewery was the inventor of Bionade. The Peter-Brauerei was struggling in the 1980s and was not far-off bankruptcy. As a desperate measure, the family opened a disco on the brewery grounds which just about kept the business afloat. As he pulled pints – or half-litres – for bored young locals until 5am, the Braumeister Dieter Leipold dreamed of inventing a drink which would not just keep the brewery going but give the whole family a comfortable existence.

 

Herr Leipold’s dream was of an alcohol-free refreshing drink that would be like “Fanta without chemicals”. Using his skill in the processes of brewing and fermentation and his knowledge of organic ingredients, he started to experiment with fermenting organic barley and in 1995, Bionade was born.

 

The family were proud of their product and wanted to offer the licence to other breweries to ferment the product themselves, using their existing skills and equipment but, in the early days, no-one was particularly interested. So, the Peter-Brauerei started producing Bionade themselves. The other breweries are probably kicking themselves now, as Bionade has been a runaway success in the last three years with 7m bottles produced in 2004, 22m in 2005 and a projected 66m for 2006. The brand is estimated to be worth €100m.

 

Bionade is a simple enough idea – a soft drink made from fermenting organic barley and malt, then diluting and adding organic sugar and concentrated juice. The drink comes in a variety of flavours – Elderberry, Herb, Lychee and Ginger-Orange. Bionade got its real breakthrough in 1998 when the owner of the über-trendy Gloria Bar in Hamburg discovered the drink at a Gastronomic Fair and started offering it to the movers and shakers who frequented his bar. In fact, most of the marketing that Bionade has carried out is non-traditional. There were no glossy T.V campaigns, rather, the brand has relied on word-of-mouth, personal recommendation (face-to-face and via Internet) and guerilla activity (promotions in “happening” bars).

 

The success has been phenomenal: sometime last year, Bionade crossed from being cult to being mainstream but has lost none of its appeal. The major grocery retailers even dropped their normal listings fee, so keen were they to get Bionade on their shelves. 

 

The Peter-Brauerei is finding it difficult to cope with demand, but plans are afoot to substantially expand their premises. Perhaps one heart-warming side to the story is that success does not appear to have gone to the family’s heads. Unlike others in their position, they have not yet been tempted to sell-out, even though it is known that Coca-Cola has offered them a substantial sum. Herr Leipold still owns the patent and his wife and stepsons run the company. Behind their decision not to sell seems to be an acknowledgement of the jobs and prosperity that they have brought to their little corner of Germany and certainly the future plans seem to be to support local farmers by buying all the ingredients from the Rhön area and to expand abroad slowly and step-by-step.

 

Bionade is a drink that not only tastes good, but one has to feel good on hearing the success story of Herr Leipold and his family.

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It’s been a long time since I’ve had a bottle of Bionade. I may have had one last year - I can’t really remember. 2007 proved to be the peak in the brand’s sales, at 200 million bottles. In 2008, the brand had a price rise (maybe to fund the first real ad campaign, which was along the lines of The official beverage of a better world).

Sales started declining. In 2011, they were down to 60 million bottles. The brand was part- and then completely sold off to Radeberger in 2012. Dieter Leipold died in 2014. 

Plenty of factors contributed to Bionade’s fall from grace. Too many wannabes, trying to get in on the act? A perception that the brand had sold out? 

The brand made a fresh start in 2018, with its purchase by the Hassia Group. I couldn’t find any recent sales figures, but there seem to be signs of a slow comeback. Apparently sales did well during Covid and the brand is riding a little - shock horror - retro wave at the moment. 

And yet ... I feel as if it’s lost its quirkiness and bite. Ice Tea, Mate and various “cloudy” versions have joined the flavour line-up. The brand slogan is translated as The most honest fizzy drinks in the world. Bionade: Honestly Good.

But I still have a soft spot for this soft drink. It was new in Germany when I was. It was a sustainability pioneer among brands and had a well-deserved Golden Age around the time of the football Sommermärchen. I do hope it can find a sunny future.

RETROWURST: Women September 2006

 

Now and again, I find something in the Retrowurst files that I genuinely can’t remember writing. A symptom of ageing brain? I’m not convinced, as much of the category and brand-related stuff seems to have been filed away in a readily accessible place. Discounters to drugstores, beers to burgers. Maybe there’s an element of denial at play, as these pieces tend to be about social issues rather than marketing and brand communications. But what they have in common is that, reading them back nearly two decades later, they feel as if they hail from a different world.

This piece, taking the not-particularly-niche subject of “women”, used two self-help type books (one light in tone and tongue-in-cheek, the other sadly not) to introduce the theme of the lot of women, especially mothers, in Germany in the early 2000s. 

Does anyone remember Das Eva Prinzip by Eva Herman or Das Uschi Prinzip by Meike Rensch-Bergner? I wonder if the books are even still in print ...

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A well-known news reader and TV presenter is causing a storm here in Germany with a book that very few people have yet read but that on which almost everyone has an opinion to offer. The lady in question is called Eva Herman and she has called her book “Das Eva-Prinzip”. It really doesn’t matter one jot if you’ve never heard of Frau Herman as she and her book only really play a catalytic role in re-lighting a fire that has been smoldering away here for years.

 

In “Das Eva Prinzip”, apparently (as I also haven’t read it as the publication date seems to keep moving backwards and forwards like a silly girl who can’t make up her mind), Frau Herman sets out the case that feminism was a big mistake and has only led to women being unhappy, denying their innate womanliness and losing out on having children. It is a call to recognize that men are men, women are women, and men should be out working or hunting and bringing home the bacon and Bratwurst while women should stay at home and look after the children. If we all stuck to the way things should be, a lot more children would be born in Germany, and it would be a much happier place.

 

This jolly little tome, incidentally, is hot on the heels of another sort of Prinzip, “Das Uschi Prinzip”, which was a sort of German version of “The Rules”, giving tips and advice to young women on how the “catch the man of their dreams” by using their womanly wiles to the full rather than behaving like some sort of aggressive second-rate man. (See www.uschi-und-uschi.de where the author has made a whole concept out of this, offering seminars, workshops and the like!)

 

But let’s get back to Frau Herman. Interestingly, she doesn’t seem to have lived her own life so far according to her own principles and one can only imagine that she has written the book out of the kindness of her heart to stop young women from making the same foolish choices and mistakes that she did. Eva Herman studied for a career in hotel management and moved into journalism and TV. She has already written a number of books on such subjects as breastfeeding and how to get your child to sleep through the night (A sort of German Gina Ford.). In between she has gone through four husbands and has one child from the third of these. Just the sort of person that you want to have telling you how to run your life!

 

Some commentators have gone as far as to say that Frau Herman’s book has nothing to do with German society as a whole but is her own personal outpouring or sort of therapy to still her longing for a perfect family life that seems never to be satisfied. Eva Herman’s father died when she was only 6, her mother worked and it seems that, to compound this unhappiness, little Eva was not breastfed.

 

Whether we choose to agree with her or not, Eva Herman’s book argues for one solution to one of the main issues that is facing Germany in the 21^st century: one of the largest countries in the E.U also has the lowest birthrate at just 1.35. The future economic implications of this are clear so maybe we shouldn’t criticize Frau Herman too much, whatever her motives, in at least addressing the issue and presenting one way forward (or backward, depending on your perspective!).

 

There is a strange paradox in Germany whereby men and women have equal opportunities as long as the women are childless. In the school and study years, girls are even ahead of boys in terms of academic qualifications: there are more girls than boys with Abitur, which is like German A-Levels and it is expected that, by 2010, more women will go on to further education than men. But it seems that more and more intelligent and well-qualified young women are opting out of having a family:

 

26% of 37-40 years old German women are childless.

33.5% of women with further education in Germany are childless.

42% of women born in 1960 who have higher education are childless.

 

The reason for this is not, perhaps, as Eva Herman suggests, that these young women are making a mistake by pursuing a career, but more because German society in its structure and attitude makes it extremely difficult for women to have a career and a family. Structurally, it starts with the availability of pre-kindergarten childcare which is almost non-existent. Women are encouraged not to go back to work for the first three years (they are not financially rewarded but are at least assured of a job when and if they go back, although the job may bear little resemblance to the one that they left.) It is not unusual for those women that can to plan their children at 3-yearly intervals so that they can start the next round of Erziehungsurlaub as soon as the last one finishes. Employers, with odd exceptions, aren’t exactly welcoming when women come back, and one gets the feeling that a woman who comes back and works part-time is resented as a cost who probably needs re-training and who almost certainly is going disappear punctually each day rather than being appreciated for what she can bring to enrich the company.

 

You may have noticed “part-time” there. Why can’t these women come back and do a full-time job, you may wonder. The answer lies in the German school system, another example of an element of society that has not kept pace with the modern world. The fact is that in Germany, most children, from the age of 6-19, only attend school in the mornings. It is expected that someone will collect them at lunchtime, feed them, supervise their homework (which also starts at age 6) and then organize and ferry them around to any sports or hobbies in the afternoon. While most UK schools have sports teams, children in Germany have to join a club independent of the school to play football, hockey or whatever.

 

Some day-care places are available for primary school children, but these are few and far between, and even then, these places tend to be until 2 or 3 o’clock and only if you are very lucky, for a “whole day” which usually means until 4:30 or so. Priority is given to single mothers and cases of financial hardship, not to “dual earners”. With this kind of system in place and no signs of change in the near future, it is no wonder that many bright young women are choosing career over children. And if the system itself wasn’t bad enough, the overwhelming attitude from society in general doesn’t make things any better. There is an expression that seems only to exist in Germany – Rabenmutter – literally “Raven Mother” for any woman that dares to think that she might be able to carry on her career and let her children play happily and supervised by professionals in the company of other children until the late hour of 4pm! Why ravens should be party to this sort of insult is beyond me – there seems to be no biological basis for this and one would have thought that maybe a cuckoo was a better analogy. But perhaps the Germans just love their cuckoo clocks too much to use the bird’s name as an insult!

 

Interestingly, IKEA have timed their latest advertising campaign here impeccably to fit in with this controversy. Posters have appeared around the cities with provocative messages such as “Women must combine household, children and career!”, “Women who want children must give up their career!” and “Men must go to work, women must change nappies!” This is all a teaser, of course for the IKEA way of a more individual and comfortable life at home, whatever way you choose to live, work and have a family. And that’s the key to it, of course. German women don’t need any more Principles from Eva, Uschi and the rest, just flexibility in the system and support and tolerance from society to run their lives in the way that suits them.

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Eighteen years later, many of the mums I knew from the Elterbeirat or Kinderturnen are now Omas. And yes, that is reflected in the German birthrate. The lot of working mums has improved a little, with more Kindergarten places available, for children aged 1-3 as well as the 3 - 6 traditional age group. With increased female leadership in politics and business, and fathers playing a bigger role in Erziehung, society attitudes are shifing. Slowly, but shifting never-the-less.

The birth rate reached its low point a couple of years after I wrote this article, in 2008. It crept up a little, due to increased immigration, but has crept down again in recent years, although not below the 2008 low point.

The rate of childlessness rose up to around 2012, but seems to have stabilised, with around a 20% incidence of childlessness amongst all cohorts born 1966 - 1977 (women currently aged 47 - 58). But the rate is much lower amongst women with a low level of education - at around 11%.

And what of Uschi and Eva? 

Meike Rensch-Bergner is still writing, and also busy coaching, podcasting and running businesses connected with sewing, tailoring and body-positivity in general. 

As for Eva Herman, well, she was sacked from her prominent position as a news anchor by ARD in 2007. She made some unwise remarks about gender roles in Nazi Germany and has now drifted into writing and podcasting outside of the mainstream on Telegram. Topics cover everything from politics and gender roles to spirituality and health.

I haven’t ventured in to see if she’s got anything worth saying, or whether it’s all conspiracy theories and bonkers rants. But then again, I never read her book, either.

  

RETROWURST: World Cup Marketing May 2006

 

I was rather hoping this would come up: the 2006 World Cup, hosted by Germany. And what a fascinating insight into collective memory and how that works. I wrote this article in early May 2006, a few weeks before the tournament kicked off. It contrasts the doomful tone of the media (rubbish, no-hoper German team, hooligans, terrorists, worrying levels of flag-waving - where are the Neo Nazis?,  how’s the chap in the furry lion suit going to survive the heatwave ...

... with the cheap and cheerful to tacky and tawdry marketing and themed products (World Cup salamis and cheeses, an 11-bottle Schnapps team, the inevitable beach towels and Fußball sushi ...

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I’m afraid I can hold out no longer: since the beginning of this year, I’ve wanted to make some sort of comment on the preparations for the World Cup from a marketing point of view but have resisted. However, a walk through the town centre at the weekend was all it took to tip the balance. In short, I could hardly believe the extremes of silliness that some retailers and manufacturers will go through to make a quick Euro.

 

Although the bulk of what I am going to describe here can be classified under tacky, frivolous and throwaway, the overall climate of opinion regarding the World Cup in Germany as portrayed in the media is far from positive or optimistic. As well as the perennial discussion about just how badly or embarrassingly the German team will play, there are worries about whether stadium safety standards have been reached, how to control the hooligans (not just English: there are also severe concerns about punch-ups between Germany and its neighbours Holland and Poland), whether German efficiency will suffer a blow in the eyes of the world with it all simply not being ready in time, the possibility of Al Qaeda attacks (with the memory of Munich 1972 still strong in many minds) and, sometimes in the same breath, how the poor chap who has to wander around in the 35kg costume of the mascot “Goleo” will cope in in-costume temperatures of up to 50°C! All in all, one doesn’t get the impression that anyone here is looking forward to it much if you just read the papers.

 

However, if you watch a TV commercial break or pop into your local supermarket, it’s quite a different story. Let’s take TV and radio first: if you watch a typical commercial break at the moment, you’ll be hard pushed to find a spot that doesn’t reference football in some way. On radio, it’s even worse. While many companies might think twice about producing a TV spot that they can only run for a couple of months, radio is quick and cheap in comparison. The other problem is that everybody – absolutely everybody – is leaping on the bandwagon. The official sponsors and those that have a logical connection to football or at least sport are all fair enough, but unfortunately everyone wants to play the game with connections that get spurioser and spurioser, to misquote Lewis Carroll.

 

The TV and radio breaks are bad enough but at least you can turn off or zap through them. What you can’t avoid doing for the next few weeks – unless you’re into Home Shopping, which, incidentally, hasn’t really caught on here – is do your shopping. I thought that you might be amused by just some of the products that are “available for a limited time only” from the local stores here. As well the stuff we all expect, like heavily discounted TV sets, football shirts (Germany, Brazil, Italy & Argentina – very rarely Holland or England!) and caps, goals and balls and flags, there are rather a lot of nasty novelties where one wonders what the people had been on in the innovation sessions where these were conceived:

 

The local bakers all seem to have got hold of baking tins that give rolls the appearance of a football and fast-food outlets such as Nordsee are using these as buns for some of their products.

 

As this is Germany, you can’t move for masses of specially produced beach towels with FIFA logos, maps of Germany, German flags and Goleo himself (so you can experience those 50°C temperatures yourself, I suppose.)

 

Salami in the shape of the World Cup itself or a football boot. Well, I suppose it could have been cheese, talking of which: slices of cheese with a footballer design in darker/orange cheese - I am the only one who finds a connection between football and cheese rather unsavoury, it seems!

 

A pack of 12 hard-boiled eggs coloured black (4), red (4) and yellow (4). This is called “Fanblock” which I suppose is what happens to your insides if you eat them all at once.

 

Lebkuchen made and coloured in football shapes and designs.

 

A “team” of 11 mini-Schnapps bottles in different fruit flavours, complete with a free whistle, presumably to call help when you can’t walk or speak properly any more after these.

 

A cake mix to bake a special “Fußballtorte” or Football cake.

 

But perhaps the overall prize for the nastiest idea should go to the deep-frozen 8 Fussball-Sushi, including a pair of chopsticks. These really are Sushi in the form of footballs and look so unappetizing that I think you’d need to drink the entire Schnapps team before even considering eating them!

 

I can’t really see anything improving in the next few weeks as the shops pile up more and more of this junk and compete with each other for the tackiest products and displays. In the meantime, I am going to keep a close eye out to see if anyone is actually buying any of this stuff but I have a nasty feeling that, once the final and the tournament is all over and the poor chap in the Goleo outfit climbs out of his furry sauna for the last time, then all these tacky products will still be sitting on the substitutes bench, or at least the discount corner, waiting in vain for their chance to shine.

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Well, I didn’t see that coming ... Die Welt zu Gast bei Freunden turned out to be a Sommermärchen - a Summer Fairytale. Italy won the thing, but the Germans - team and people won everyone’s hearts and third place. The best-organised World Cup ever. A month long festival of sunshine, football, optimism, family fun. People still talk about it with a misty-eyed reverence normally reserved for Woodstock or similar. 

Kaiser Franz is no longer with us, but I wonder how much of the golden memory will shine on when Germany host the Euros, kicking off in June.